Eric Lars Bakke / Photographer

On January 20th a new journey began for my wife Nancy and me. It will be an arduous course with challenges that will test our will, our faith and our strength. It began on December 22, 2009 when we learned she had breast cancer once again. Her first bout was eleven years ago and she endured that experience on her own. Now that I am in her life, we will take on this rascal together. Nan had surgery early on the morning of the 20th. She joined forces with Dr. Joyce Haun, a Denver Kaiser-Permanente surgeon. They are two strong, dynamic women, who I believe given the opportunity, could  tackle any darn thing nearly single-handed.

My wife is a genuine, determined, principled and a caring individual but often times private. She wasn’t particularly thrilled when I told her I wanted to discuss and document our journey. The day before the surgery she made it perfectly clear,”No cameras”! When she discovered I was taking some candid shots with my iPhone camera  early the morning of surgery, she gave me the evil look but I wanted her to know I was doing it from my perspective as a husband and supporter, hoping that the endeavor might be a help to others. It also was, I guess in someways, a distraction for me. Something to keep me busy.

Since the tumor was aggressive (infiltrating ductal carcinoma), going into to new uncharted waters was a bit unsettling to say the least. Before meeting with Dr. Haun we discussed many issues, did some online research  and set out on our own pragmatic course.

There are times in our lives when things unfold in a very deliberate way. I think Dr. Haun was our lucky charm. We met Dr. Haun on January 12th and within minutes we individually could tell she was our guiding light. What was special about her was her straight forward talk of the circumstances we would face, options to attack this dastardly beast, and the great possibilities that lie ahead. She didn’t beat around the bush but she also had a calming and reassuring way about herself. She readily admitted she didn’t have all the answers right away but displayed confidence she would be able to lead us in the right direction while offering her expertise and guidance. All this with an upbeat demeanor, compassion and a sense of humor that would give Letterman a run for his money. In short she is a jewel.

Surgery day was a long one as anyone would expect. We left the house at o’ dark thirty and  Nancy was in  Kaiser’s radiology department at 6:30 a.m. for imaging dye. Then we shuffled a stone’s throw away to St. Joseph’s Hospital for her pre- op. I kidded with people they wanted to have her in the operating room while she was still asleep so she didn’t  know what hit her! Surgery wasn’t a cake walk for Nancy but things went without a hitch. Dr.Haun and her staff kept me posted by calling the waiting room on various steps of the procedures. That was a very comforting and satisfying gesture.

Because the of the lengthy time and detail of the mastectomy, I decided to grab lunch across the street with my sister who was so kind to come and sit in with me while the operation continued. Normally, I probably wouldn’t have budged from the waiting room but I felt so confident in Dr. Haun and her team I felt the small break would be good for me since I had been on task for over six hours.I was told I had about an hour and half before she would be settled in her room. Wrong! Just as my sis and I ordered lunch, the waiting room volunteer called my cellphone and said Nancy was on her way to her room.

A leisurely lunch became a quick bite and off we went to see Nancy.

I didn’t know what to expect and I certainly wasn’t sure what kind of shape my sidekick would be in after such an ordeal. Surprisingly, Nancy looked terrific! A little groggy and struggling with a slight sore throat from the intubation. But, hey who wouldn’t be complaining about an apparatus being shoved down your throat! She was already upright and partaking in a liquid lunch. She was a real trooper and I was very relieved.

Dr. Haun visited during her rounds late that afternoon. She was exuberant and extremely sweet in her discussions with Nancy. We knew from an examination during the operation that her Sentinel node reported no signs of cancer. Dr. Haun assured us she would let us know as soon as possible what the status of the other lymph nodes reported in the days to follow.

The highlight of the afternoon was when Dr. Haun asked Nancy if she had any questions. Nancy’s query was, ” Will I be able to go to Las Vegas with my friend Brigette the 13th of February?” Honest truth. I was chuckling inside because I knew right then and there Nancy had her own agenda on her recovery route. It’s an annual trip she and her friend take in February. The doctor thought that might be a little premature and wasn’t sure what Nancy’s post op treatment would be quite yet.

She kidded Nan and said if chemotherapy was involved and she lost her hair, she could easily go as Tina Turner one night and choose a another celebrity hairdo the next. Nancy was slightly amused.

Nancy could have gone home that evening but Dr. Haun thought a precautionary overnight stay might  be best since my wife tends to get nauseated with most pain medicines. The weird thing about that is Nancy never did take pain meds!

So, when I came to pick her up the following morning, not only was she dressed ( in a very becoming warm up suit, I might add) and raring to go, she walked right out of the hospital. I was floored.

As a husband and a prepared caregiver I made sure everything was in place when she came home to convalesce. Wait, the day before surgery Nancy was cleaning at home like a maniac though I did help with some of the chores. At any rate, we planned for various types of light foods and drinks. Her bedding was freshly cleaned and I charged up  my “walkie-talkies” so we could communicate from various locales in the house.

Within an hour of Nancy settling in for some quiet time the phone began to ring. Friends, family and professional associates were on the horn offering love, support and prayers. Nancy decided  that day to catch up on her email as well, which also was inundated with electronic well wishes.Then the flowers and food began to flow into our home. We could have started a small bistro with flowers for every table! Our home smells of spring and Martha Stewart’s kitchen!

The day of surgery her long time friend Marge equipped me with a mini cooler brimming  with containers of homemade “Jewish chicken soup”. That she said, ” was to hold us over until she orchestrated meals from Nancy’s friends and professional peers. Topping that with incredible dishes from our Evergreen area neighbors and friends, Nancy said her biggest fear was blowing up like a blimp.

It has been nearly a week since her surgery.She looks beautiful and her strength is pretty much back. She has been on a couple small hikes with the dogs, managed emails and phone calls and is determined to get as many thank you cards in the mail as humanly possible.

Her will, determination, attitude and resolve are sound. Along with those same objectives, I am concerned but very optimistic. The journey is long with some hidden curves but we are on the right path.

The wonderful light illuminating that path is shining from all of Nancy’s friends, our families and those that have entered our lives in so many different ways.

My View of Nancy’s Day by iPhone

The Kaiser Permanente radiology department was a bit eerie in the pre dawn hour. The good news was there were no lines.

Surreal light bathed our walk to nearby St. Joseph's Hospital

Paper work. Need I say more?

"ID"ed and "IV"ed

Around 8:30 a.m. anesthetization was the topic between Nancy and Dr. Conrad in pre op

A pink ribbon and a statue of Christ. Not bad icons to have outside the building of your operating room.

The waiting room was spacious and comfortable...not the Ritz Carlton lobby mind you, but it was a good place to relax and get some editing done and keep me preoccupied.

Nancy's surgeon Dr. Joyce Haun, a physician who upholds the ultimate credo of "bedside manner", gave Nancy a thorough briefing the afternoon following surgery.

Once Dr. Haun became aware of my photo essay she had to get in on the act and insisted I kiss Nancy!

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Wow, where did this year go? In fact, where did the decade go? It doesn’t seem that long ago that I climbed Bergen Peak  here in Evergreen CO. on New Years Eve 1999 to usher in the new millenium.

In the balance of life this was not a great year. However, I have many blessings  to be grateful for and I look forward to the challenges  and adventures that come my way in the months ahead.

I wish the best for everyone as the year unfolds. Thank you to all that support me and my work and offer the personal relationships that make it all worthwhile.

Just for grins, I would like to share several of my favorite images of 2009. Happy New Year!

During a December NFL game Denver Broncos Brian Dawkins cranked up his mojo

In June Samantha Sagaser of Conifer CO. modeled for my illustration for the Arts in Evergreen feature article in the Chamber of Commerce Annual Business Directory

During the BMX Vert competition at the Summer XGames in Los Angeles last August, Jamie Bestwick went high flying.

I was contracted by local craftsman Don Harris to photograph his collection in April. The challenge was to do justice to these eloquent hardwood pieces sculpted with TLC, immense detail and fine rich grain.

Last May I captured a red fox enjoying an early evening nap in the field grass near our home in Evergreen, CO.

During the bike portion of the 2009 Ford World Ironman Championship last October, cyclists were greeted by the stare of a goat skull mysteriously mounted on the post of a guardrail just south of Hawi. If you are wondering , I didn't put it there either!

This photo is in memory of Taupe, our 13 year-old Weimeraner we lost last fall. She accompanied me on an assignment near Kenosha Pass last summer when I photographed her in a meadow of wildflowers.

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Dull as it is, this has been my view and office for seven days as I try to heal from a back injury.

Somewhere between the Queen Ka’ ahumanu Highway covering the Ford World Ironman Championship October 10, the Boston Patriots AFL throwback game less than twelve hours later  in Denver October 11  or the hike with the wife and dogs on October 18th , four hours before boarding a plane to cover the Monday NFL game in San Diego, a nerve in my lumbar decided it had had enough. About mid day on the 18th not long after the hike, my left hamstring started barking at me like an old ‘Coon” dog.

I first thought I tweaked  the “hamy”. Something I have done a gazillion times as a 10K runner and mountaineer. I stretched. I prodded. I massaged the back of my leg as I packed for my trip to San Diego. I figured a hot shower before I left would give some relief. I arrived in San Diego and began messaging and stretching once I got settled into my hotel room. As the evening progressed,  as I had dinner with my compatriots in La Jolla, the old dog really began to howl and I even started carrying a gimp.

The next morning, less than twelve hours before the game, my leg and foot were numb and I could barely walk. I threw up the rescue flag and called friend and team chiropractor Dr. Mike Leahy in his room. He said come right away. Hobbling down the hallway, past the team meeting rooms, getting odd stares and inquiries about my condition, I made it to Mike’s room and waiting message table. After about three thorough routines his prognosis determined a disk and nerve injury. He felt there wasn’t much we could do from that point forward until I could get a full exam.

At the stadium the stares turned to gawking. I sucked it up and did my best Frankenstein imitation shuffling up and down the sidelines. Team orthopedic physician Martin Boublik caught a glimpse of me as I bobbled by the bench. He scurried over and asked about my situation. Right then and there he ran me through several mobility tests and conferred what Mike Leahy had suggested.

Team doctor Steven  Geraghty was on my team bus back to the airport and in a rather genuine and heroic move offered to prescribe medication to start retarding the inflammation and promote healing. Dr. Leahy offered to see me at his clinic in Colorado Springs in the following days before he left for a conference in Toronto. Dr. Boublik updated his consultation on the bus as well.

Other than the medication, the only thing else I could commit to was their advise of ice, heat and rest. Thank goodness the team had a a bye week  last week as I was clearly on injured reserve!

So here I am seven days later making every effort to be ready for our next away game in Baltimore. Now I know how frustrated  injured players must get as they prepare their return to action.

Another thing folks should know is team often times goes beyond just the players and coaches.

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When you live in the mountains or the country  like I do, regular hikes are fun, good for the health and something we look forward to most days. When you are owners of two zany Weimeraners it’s  a requisite. And trust me they remind you constantly. I just finished up a hike yesterday and had Taupe and Gandalf back in the rig after a beautiful albiet cool, misty fall hike.

Dogs, as canine owners know, get a peculiar smell after they have been rained on or have cruised through a stream or pond. Our dogs tend to have  a smell much like wet wool socks. It’s not really offensive but you are definitely aware of the smell.

Yesterday, after our jaunt,Gandalf was sitting in the backseat poised regally and stinking to high heaven. I knew the smell but couldn’t put my finger on it right away. It wasn’t until I saw the grass-green streak running down his shoulder that I knew he had rolled in elk poop. Let me tell you, fresh elk poop can bring you to your knees when it’s up close and personal.

There's nothing like a large glob of elk poop on your dog's collar to get your senses fired up.

I said something like, ” oh, Gandalf not again”. And there he sat proud as ever.

Then I couldn’t figure out w why such a small amount of feces could smell so bad. On further inspection when I got him out of the car at the office I discovered the culprit. It was a golf ball-sized clump of poop desperately clinging to his dog collar. I took the collar off, received an embarrassing glance from Gandy and proceeded to dump the collar in a bucket of hot water and deodorizer soap. Then I took a long deep breath of the fresh fall air.

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I am not positive but I think fall might be just around the corner. Or at least one of our local bears thinks so.

A black bear made a surprise early visit tonight trying to load up on suet, seeds and humming bird nectar.

When I went out about 5:45 this morning to disperse the various bird feeders that adorn the property, twelve to be exact, there seemed to be a cooler feel to the air. It was rich, full-bodied with subtle hints of pine, aspen and the familiar smell of early fall. It is a hard one  to describe but it is something that always seems to happen this time of year in the high country. The lower lying meadow grass appeared heavy with dew and at closer inspection  I found frost on about a twenty yard section  in the lowest portion of our field grasses. Once I returned to the kitchen for my first cup of coffee there was a peculiar sound that lingered. A slightly musty smell permeated the room and then it dawned on me. The heat came on in the house.

What? I thought. August 17th? This can’t be, but sure enough I went over and held my hand to one of the registers and warm air was flowing. This time of year the thermostat is set at 50 degrees so needless to say the furnace was pulling off a preseason warm up.

Then, this evening after I wrapped up some editing in the office, I thought I would go out and collect the feeders early because we had a bear visit recently and manage to wipe out a humming bird feeder I overlooked one night.

Much to my surprise as I looked out the office window, Yogi had invited himself over early. I immediately went into red alert mode. I ran and frantically closed all the doors that led to the garage where  the dogs could bolt out in pursuit of the bruin.

Then I sprinted to all the feeders within a safe range, gathered an arm load and retreated to the garage and shut the door. The last thing I needed was “Yogi-meister” clambering for the bins of bird seed, dog treats or any other delectable items stored within striking distance.

At last glance, the young bear stood outreached on his hind legs and took a sole swipe at a hummer feeder only to have the sweet nectar come splashing down on his ‘noggin. He examined the sticky aftermath, took a couple licks and then sauntered south.

This young bruin's reward was a soaked muzzle of humming bird nectar.

I can’t wait for the elk to start bugling and rutting at 3 a.m. in the next several weeks. You have to love fall. Especially in the high country.

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